Closed Doors

My job seems to be a continual pattern of closed doors. I suppose I should rejoice, for this is an answer, but it's difficult when 8x in a year, the answer is no. My boss did a good job explaining why and I do not take it personally (and now have some areas to work on improving) but nonetheless, "no" is difficult to hear so often.

The reason has been different each time, therefore my only conclusion can be that this is God's will for me right now and that in whatever state I am, I must learn to be content (not simply for "doings" sake but because I know that no matter what state I'm in, He is with me).

"For I lead the blind in ways that they do not know, in paths that they have not gone, I guide them. I turn the rough places before them into level ground. These are the things I do; I do not forsake them."

I'm not forsaken. Stuck behind the same door, stuck in the same room, stuck in limbo, I am not forsaken. Still wondering why and when, God is saying "I'm here, I haven't left you alone to figure this out on your own. I'm guiding. I'm leading. And I'm comforting."

That must be and remain my comfort. If it is not, then I start to question and accuse God. Job questioned God and was met by the all-powerful Creator. That all-powerful God is the same one holding back right now. He's the same one closing the doors in front of me. He's the same one not opening other doors I long to walk through.

But, keeping this in perspective, I don't deserve a new job. I don't deserve better pay. I deserve hell. And God opened the greatest door in all of eternity - the door to eternal life, rest and complete fulfillment in Him.

With that in mind, how can I complain. In light of eternity, how can I question. God has been so kind - eternally, immensely kind. He's right now preparing a place for me - a filthy, vile sinner who is justified not by my own merit, but by the righeousness of His Son.

That's why our lives are commanded to be a sacrifice of praise. I don't wan"t to sacrifice that right now. I want to lament. I want to cry.

But He says - NO!!! Grab your soul - arrest your mind and focus it on me. Don't give in to the devil's lie that you deserved this and I'm unkind in withholding it from you. Focus on truth - I loved you so much (and continue to love you) that I gave ALL for you - I sacrificed with JOY for your good. Rest there. Rejoice in that truth.

Let your conduct be the same as mine - offering up sacrifices of praise to God when your circumstances deem the opposite. That's how I receive glory here - through yet another closed door. That's where the world will see your differences and glorify me. Trust me, my child. I know what I'm doing."

Safely Home

excerpt from "Safely Home" by Randy Alcorn... thoughts to follow...

"The watchers searched the earth, their eyes probing every tent, cave, hole, and dungeon. The King looked at the continents, his eyes searching from place to place. He would pause periodically, watch and nod.

In the Netherlands a small church gathered on its knees to pray for the persecuted. In Australia, a church took a special offering to assist a ministry getting Bibles into closed countries. In Korea, a church made plans to cross the border. In Singapore, a man left his family to board a plane, for some remote destination.

His eyes rested now on a 5th grade Sunday school class in America as they collected money. “This is all I earned last summer mowing lawns” said a boy. “This is the money I was saving for a bicycle” a little girl said, smiling. A boy proudly handed his teacher an envelope. She opened it, then looked at him. “Where did this come from?” I told mom and dad we’d been talking about persecuted Christians and how to help them.

I told them how we were all making a sacrifice to collect money to help. My parents said they wanted to help too. So I said maybe we didn’t have to go to Disney Land; maybe we could just go to the beach for the weekend. That’s what we did. We had a great time. This is all the money we would have spent, you know for planes and hotels and admissions and everything.

The King watched nodding and smiling. “Thank you” he said to the children in the Sunday school class. He turned to the men and angels of the watching heavens “whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did it for Me. Your reward shall be great."

"Never forget Jesu is King. Never forget this is not your home. Never forget your Father is waiting for you."