free fall

as i’m falling
the fears rush in.
going places
i’ve never been.

what’s around
the coming bend?
i cannot see
the journey’s end.

i’m unsure -
its unclear.
feeling so
misguided here.

no direction
no way out
trust becomes
replaced with doubt.

are you there God?
i’m falling fast.
help before all
hope is past!

then a whisper
grabs my soul.
remember Me –
I’ll make you whole.

I’ve been faithful
look behind
I’ve upheld you
every time.

every child
with humble prayer
who comes to Me
receives My care.

remember Joseph!
remember Job!
and Habakkak
from so long ago.

they looked to Me.
they found their rest.
they learned that My

ways are the best.

i don’t give up
on My sov’reign plan
as you pursue
My guiding hand.

repent of pride
and unbelief
and you too will
find rest and peace.

Give Unto the Lord

Give unto the Lord who guides the earth,
your ways and your distress.
As He guides the clouds and air and wind
He’ll also guide your steps.

Come to Him now boldly with confident trust
He’s promised to faithfully lead.
Ask, trusting in prayer, for His gracious Hand
to guide you in your times of need.

In eternal mercy, O God of all,
You know what is right and what’s best.
Grant me grace to trust in Your Sovereign Hand
as You choose for me every test.

There’s never a time, Lord, in all that You do
You work in a way that’s not right
No trial can hinder your Almighty Hand
as I walk by faith and not sight.

So, even if all hell’s attempting to take
me viciously from your control –
You will not give way, Lord, you’re working Your plan
to Your ultimate glory and goal.

Look up, weary soul now from all your despair –
keep fighting, do not be dismayed;
For in His great mercy, He’ll comfort your heart
and will daily supply you fresh grace.

All sorrows will weaken their iron-clad grasp
as you learn of His governing pow’r
Let go of your troubles and sorrow no more
For He’s in control of each hour.

Let Him act how He deems is best for your life,
for He is your governing King.
When you view His wisdom throughout all your days
Your heart in amazement will sing.

At times in your life, He’ll delay consolation
so you’ll learn to rest wholly on Him;
but remember He disciplines those whom He loves
so take comfort, your future’s not dim.

As you faithfully serve Him, deliverance will come
for He’s promised to always be near
He will set you free from your burden and strife
and your heart he’ll set free from all fear.

What joy awaits you, O sweet faithful child
what glory awaits on that day
when with wonderful gladness, He hands you that crown –
pure joy will then sorrow outweigh.

We pray, faithful Lord that you’d lovingly bring
our trials and sorrows to an end
But until that day, Lord, hold fast – keep our faith
as we struggle and fight and contend.

Translated by Emily from “Befiehl du deine Wege”
written by Paul Gerhardt 1653
based on Martin Luther's writings of Psalm 37:5
featured in Opus BWV270 in B minor arranged by J.S. Bach
alternate English translation: Give to the Winds thy Fears by J. Wesley

Captive

Deep in my sin, I couldn’t feel
the death grip on my soul.
I thought that this life was the best
for which I’d ever hope.

True satisfaction,
eternal bliss,
deep communion
was just a wish.
I was at home
with misery.
Tried to dull the pain
of what I saw in me.

I didn’t realize I was blind,
I thought that this was "life;"
until one day I heard the words:
“Come, there’s rest from all this strife.”

"An answer
for the void you feel -
a hope
for your captive soul.
A rest eternal -
- it's for real.
a promise
in His Word."

It sounded to my tired ears
just too good to be true.
But as He drew near, I heard the damning words:
“there’s nothing you can do.”

“You’ve sinned.
You’re guilty.
You can’t come
before My Holy face.
I’m Rightous and I can’t allow
such filth
here in this place.”

With sorrow and dread I stood before
my Maker, in my chains.
Fearing His hand of judgment
that would crush my feeble frame.

Fear compelled
Me there
To fall -
enslaved by
my desires.
I had no
power
to change my
heart or quench
the wrathful
fires.

At that moment nothing seemed
More powerful than sin.
My empty soul - in awful fear
As I stood before my King.

A captive,
held by sin
alone; a slave to
death and fear.
The Holy Judge
Was fully aware
That sin
Was my career.

Those were my chains.
Captivity.
Deep emptiness.
Hollow misery.


“What if I’m good!? I’ll change my ways!?”
frantically I tried.
But He said “no, its not enough.”
I sat in despair and cried.

“Is there a hope
or any rest?
An answer for
my empty soul?”
With tender love
He picked me up
and said
“My blood can make you whole.”

“Not by your works, Not what you do
There’s nothing to attain.
For on that cross, I bore your curse
So you’d know all My gain.”

“No! Let me go.
Don’t do this, God!
You don’t deserve
That death!
Judge me instead
I’m the guilty one
Trade places -
Go! now rest.”

With tear-filled eyes, He then looked down
at His eternally wounded hands.
“Look here, my child. The price is paid
already. This is my plan.”

“I died for you
to give you life;
My grace has set you free.
The penalty’s paid -
find freedom now
from your captivity.”

So, with great joy, we walked that day
away from all my chains.
Now hand in hand, His love is what
keeps me captive every day.

That’s what
compels me now
you see
to say no to
desires.
His love
constrains my
wayward heart
from my
internal fires.

His grace is more sufficient and
more powerful than sin.
This peace is so much greater than
I’d ever hoped it’d been.

I’m captive.
Held by grace
alone; a slave to
righteousness.
My Owner’s love
gives strength and faith
to daily die
to sin.

I'm chained to Him.

Captivity.

Deep communion.

Sweet, perfect peace.

written by Emily 12 PM on 4/24/08
after reading 2 Corinthians 5 and Romans 6

Sweet Surrender

I sacrifice with praise, oh Lord
My hopes and dreams and fears.
I surrender all, my Love
Take my sorrow; wipe my tears.

For you oh Lord are Power
Your strength is never ending
Through your mighty and amazing cross
This broken heart, you’re mending.

Take my cravings, take my guilt
Wash my sinful hands through the blood you’ve spilt.
Grant me peace and hope in you alone
Let humility in my heart grow.

You are not pleased in sacrifices
Or else, dear Lord I’d give it.
What you really want from my life is
That I trust in you and humbly live it.

A life of full dependence -
Oh that is sweet surrender.
When my conscience still condemns me
Lord, You are my strong Defender.

So, I surrender all to you
You’re the Master of my ways.
I gladly give You my desires
For You’ve planned out all my days

Yes, its sweet to trust in You, Lord
To surrender every part.
I believe and hope in Jesus
The One Physician to heal this heart.

I’m weary God, and you are strong.
My sin-filled heart finds mercy.
Its sweet to know no matter what
You hear the one who’s hurting.

You draw me near and promise that
As I draw closer so do You
My trials won’t consume me Lord
For I’m consumed with You.

Trials

daddy, this trial is hurting me
i simply want to cry.
i fear that where you’re sending me
will hurt so bad i’ll die.
where is the life of happiness,
unending days of rest?
i can’t see past this current trial -
is this really what is best?

but i believe that you're constant.
i know You're faithful and you’re good.
this light and temporary pain
is to burn off all the wood
so that you’ll present me faultless
standing there as gold one day
before the Throne of Grace to Him
and “welcome home” He’ll say.

my hope must rest in that day for
right now and here you see
this pain and unrest that I’m in -
its what is best for me.
i’m confident that he is good.
i trust that He is near.
that no matter what waves may come
i know He's greater than my fears.

The Sovereign Shepherd

Lord, the path before me's looming dark
The way ahead's unclear.
I can't see where you are working
Or even if you're leading here.
It's such a struggle to trust you
Though I know you to be true.
I'm helpless - like a sheep, dear God,
I don't know what to do.

My child, stop and listen -
I'm calling you to come.
Though you do not know the way -
I swear - that truly I'm the One
Who will lead and guide you gently
Like a dad - I'm here, I care.
Don't forget I won't desert you -
My child, I'll always be there.

But God, I cannot hear you and
I cannot feel your touch.
I'm longing for your guidance - how
I need it oh so much.
I trust you, but where are you?
Are you even really near?
I'm in a fog, my Savior -
Don't you know and see my fear?

Oh, Child, please be patient,
I'm working though you can't see;
What looks like midnight to you now
Is clear as day to me.
I'm sovereign - gently working
Not to harm, but to refine.
I gave my precious son for you -
Gave all so you'd be mine.

You doubt that I still love and care -
Don't doubt - look to the cross
For there your sacrifice was paid
And every sin was washed.
You cannot earn this love I give
and you can't find the way.
You need my tender loving hand
to guide you every day.

You fear the unknown bends ahead -
Don't fear - you are not lost.
Oh, please my child do not forget
I've fully paid the cost.
You're not lost and not forgotten
Not rejected or alone - like a sheep
I've carried you - sweet child, home -
Here into my fold.

You cannot see the path ahead but
I can - trust in Me.
It's only through the eyes of faith
You'll ever clearly see.
Just trust me - do not be afraid -
My whispering voice you'll hear -
Just listen - I'm your faithful God
And I am always near.

Eyes of Faith

We read about your glory
We see glimpses of your might
Now we ask that you'd draw near
And give these blind eyes sight.
We are helpless without you Lord
How great we need your tender hand
To pick us up and heal us
And to guide us through this land.

We want to see you
We want to know you deeper
Lord let us feel the power
in your sovereign mighty touch
We long to hear you
As we grow to know you greater
We want to see you
Lord give us eyes of faith.

Lord, I'm blind and I am helpless
I am desperate for your touch
I can't see the path before me
I need your guidance, O so much
You are sovereign and you're loving
You are infinite in strength
You're the comfort in my sorrows
and the joy of all my days

Help me to see you
Help me to know you deeper
Lord let me feel the power
in your sovereign mighty touch
Help me to hear you
As I grow to know you greater
Help me to see you
Lord give me eyes of faith.

O Lord, help me not to waiver
Help me grow strong in my faith
For you are powerful and mighty
and your promises are true.
Though the road ahead's uncertain
I am guided by your hand
Though I cannot see the way now
I know you're working out your plan.

I long to see you
O Lord, to know you deeper
Please help me feel the power
in your sovereign mighty touch
I long to hear you
As I grow to be like Jesus
I want to see you
Lord give me eyes of faith.